I know from experience , curly hair is a challenge to mange . Whether you are Black , White , or Mexican , curly hair is simply different from straight . There are just certain things you cannot do with curly hair , some things that aren't healthy for it , and ways to make it grow that people wit straight hair don't have to worry about .
Growing up as a bi-racial child , I have endured the curls , the kinks and the poof my entire life . As I got older , my best friend became my hair straightener . I have never been very fond of my curls , and I always wanted long , bone-straight hair like my friends and step sisters . However , as I have gotten older , I have learned to embrace my hair , and take healthiness over personal thought .
I used to be extremely hard on my hair . Straightening it everyday on the highest setting , dying it , perming it , washing it with sulfate enriched shampoo daily ... These are all HAIR DO NOT'S . I have changed my hair care ways for the better , so here are my tips and tricks for healthy , soft , growing , curly hair . (:
1 : DO NOT wash your hair every single day . I know there is sweat and oils in your hair ; however , the more you wash it , the more you are stripping your hair of it's natural moisture and making it more brittle and susceptible to damage .
2 : Don't flat iron your hair every day . Make it a two or three times a week thing if possible . It's really hard on your hair having it pressed between two plates at 350 degrees , and it breaks down it's strength .
3 : LOVE YOUR HAIR ! Yes , curly hair can be hard to manage , hard to brush , hard to style , it gets frizzy , etc . But it's the hair you were born with , so rock it !
4: If at all possible , avoid relaxers . Yes they are a temporary fix , but they are probably the most damaging thing you can do to your hair , right next to bleaching it . Relaxers , although they don't say it on the box , break down the structure of your hair . It goes into each strand it touches and tells the hair 'Dont Curl !' , but it's breaking and thinning your hair . The relaxed part of your hair will never be the same , and regardless of what you do , it wont be healthy until it grows back out .
5 : By good products ! The worst thing to do to your hair is to fall into the trap of 'If it's expensive , it must work really good' . FALSE ! Read the labels ! I cannot stress that enough . There are things to look out for . For example , you don't want shampoo with Sulfates of any kind in them . Also , avoid conditioners , gels , and foams with Alcohol in them . Although these products may claim to help your hair , the sulfates and alcohol are going to make your hair brittle and breakable . However , you should look for things like olive oil , vitamin A , and vitamin E .
6 : If you are going to use heat products , such as blow dryers , frequently , by a heat protecting spray . Spray it on your hair prior to applying heat , to avoid extensive heat damage .
7 : A common misconception about curly hair , especially in African-American culture , is that their hair doesn't grow . Poppy cock ! It grows just like everybody else's , but curly hair take slightly longer to show progress . The reason for this is that curly hair growing out of the skull has to curl out of the skull , so it takes longer to see progress , whereas straight hair just comes straight down , there for it's faster and easier to see the results .
8 : Trim your hair often . Once a month is recommended , but it is always good to chart the growth of your hair , and see when it is best to trim for you (:
Enjoy your hair , take care of it , love it ! (:
-Elle ♫
Friday, September 7, 2012
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Friendship , When is it real ?
When is a friendship real ? A friendship is real when you know no matter what happens , that person has your back . A friendship is real when you can laugh together , cry in front of each other , make bad decisions together , and fix them as a team . A friendship is real when they become more like family then just a 'Friend' . Finally a friendship is real when you can tell each other everything about one another without fear of rejection or judging .
How can you tell ? Sometimes you wont know with out trial and error . As heart breaking as it may be , sometimes the only way you find out is by having a 'friend' bail out on you or judge you . It happens to every one at one point in time or another .
I have been thinking a lot lately about memories I have acquired over the years , then 7th grade came to mind . See , in English class one day , a friend of mine and I came up with these candy nick names for one another and made one for one of our other friends . By mid-lunch period , everyone at our school had a 'Candy Name' . We decided it would just be us three , though . As time progressed , we added two more girls to our group . We called ourselves 'The Kandi Krew' . These girls were the four closest girls to me at that point in time , and I was ecstatic about our group . We would tell one another things we couldnt tell another soul . The problems comes in here . As I look back on it now , I realize , the entire foundation of that group was ... almost fake . I mean , our commitment to the group was real , but our commitment to each other was misguided . We didn't tell all of the group everything like we had promised , and we didn't try getting closer to the girls we didn't know as well . Sure we had cool name , but looking back on it now , we were fooling ourselves all year . Guess hein sight is 20/20 huh ?
But today , a girl , who was never in that group , is now my closest and best female friend . She is a true friend , and she is basically my sister . She is 3 days older than me , shares my same personality traits , and most importantly is always there for me . Of coarse , I will never forget my Kand Krew friends , but this girl , that I met at the same time , is the one I truly look to when I'm in need , and she's always the one to fall back on . And that , is when you know you have a true friend . <3
-Elle ♫
How can you tell ? Sometimes you wont know with out trial and error . As heart breaking as it may be , sometimes the only way you find out is by having a 'friend' bail out on you or judge you . It happens to every one at one point in time or another .
I have been thinking a lot lately about memories I have acquired over the years , then 7th grade came to mind . See , in English class one day , a friend of mine and I came up with these candy nick names for one another and made one for one of our other friends . By mid-lunch period , everyone at our school had a 'Candy Name' . We decided it would just be us three , though . As time progressed , we added two more girls to our group . We called ourselves 'The Kandi Krew' . These girls were the four closest girls to me at that point in time , and I was ecstatic about our group . We would tell one another things we couldnt tell another soul . The problems comes in here . As I look back on it now , I realize , the entire foundation of that group was ... almost fake . I mean , our commitment to the group was real , but our commitment to each other was misguided . We didn't tell all of the group everything like we had promised , and we didn't try getting closer to the girls we didn't know as well . Sure we had cool name , but looking back on it now , we were fooling ourselves all year . Guess hein sight is 20/20 huh ?
But today , a girl , who was never in that group , is now my closest and best female friend . She is a true friend , and she is basically my sister . She is 3 days older than me , shares my same personality traits , and most importantly is always there for me . Of coarse , I will never forget my Kand Krew friends , but this girl , that I met at the same time , is the one I truly look to when I'm in need , and she's always the one to fall back on . And that , is when you know you have a true friend . <3
-Elle ♫
Monday, September 3, 2012
Respect ... Expected or Earned ?
I'm sure over the years you have been told to respect your elders , but the question is ... Are they all respectable ? See , there are people that believe that you should respect your elders simply because they are older , and have been around longer , so it is assumed that they are wiser and know more . But is that always the case ? Because I know from experience , old age doesn't automatically make you a wiser person .
There are people that will argue both sides of this story . Where do I stand on this topic ? I believe respect is something a person must EARN not that it should be handed to them for any one reason . I have never been one to tolerate bullshit or disrespect , regardless of age or social status , so the idea that I should respect the 'Adults' in my life has never been a followed philosophy . I understand the reasoning behind it , though . Back in better times , the older you were , the wiser you got . You aquired information about life , learned little techniques and short cuts for things , and you were a looked up to and respected person in your community . However , times have changed . Not ever older person , or even 30 year old you meet is smarter or wiser than you . A lot of them are simply as immature today as when they were fresh into high school . So what about these people is respectable exactly ?
I am not the 'Turn The Other Cheek' kind of gal either . I don't give respect unless it's do , but I don't take disrespect , EVER . There are certain lines you do not cross with me . You don't talk badly about me or my family , you don't put your nose in my business , and you dont bring people into a debate of ours , that has nothing to do with them . Those are the main things that get me upset faster than any other thing . And I assure you I will go rounds with any person who tries to test that theory .
This recently got my mother and I into an argument . See , my mother was raised in the 80's with strict , military parents . So , respect your elders is kind of tattooed into her skull , not to mention she is way less confrontational than I am . I recently had a run in with a man on Facebook , a GROWN man , who decided to cause problems with me for no reason over a loving status directed towards my boyfriend . I wanted to correct him , cause not only was it none of his concern , he also had his facts wrong . I was told by my mother that it was disrespectful of me , that I had no right , and that if I started anything with people outside my age group , she was shutting down my social media networks ... ALL OF THEM ...
Well , that's just a risk I am willing to take . So where do you stand ? Do you believe that any one older than you deserves your respect because they have been around longer , or do you believe that respect is given where respect is due ?
-Elle ♫
There are people that will argue both sides of this story . Where do I stand on this topic ? I believe respect is something a person must EARN not that it should be handed to them for any one reason . I have never been one to tolerate bullshit or disrespect , regardless of age or social status , so the idea that I should respect the 'Adults' in my life has never been a followed philosophy . I understand the reasoning behind it , though . Back in better times , the older you were , the wiser you got . You aquired information about life , learned little techniques and short cuts for things , and you were a looked up to and respected person in your community . However , times have changed . Not ever older person , or even 30 year old you meet is smarter or wiser than you . A lot of them are simply as immature today as when they were fresh into high school . So what about these people is respectable exactly ?
I am not the 'Turn The Other Cheek' kind of gal either . I don't give respect unless it's do , but I don't take disrespect , EVER . There are certain lines you do not cross with me . You don't talk badly about me or my family , you don't put your nose in my business , and you dont bring people into a debate of ours , that has nothing to do with them . Those are the main things that get me upset faster than any other thing . And I assure you I will go rounds with any person who tries to test that theory .
This recently got my mother and I into an argument . See , my mother was raised in the 80's with strict , military parents . So , respect your elders is kind of tattooed into her skull , not to mention she is way less confrontational than I am . I recently had a run in with a man on Facebook , a GROWN man , who decided to cause problems with me for no reason over a loving status directed towards my boyfriend . I wanted to correct him , cause not only was it none of his concern , he also had his facts wrong . I was told by my mother that it was disrespectful of me , that I had no right , and that if I started anything with people outside my age group , she was shutting down my social media networks ... ALL OF THEM ...
Well , that's just a risk I am willing to take . So where do you stand ? Do you believe that any one older than you deserves your respect because they have been around longer , or do you believe that respect is given where respect is due ?
-Elle ♫
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