Tips & tricks for curly haired chicks

I know from experience , curly hair is a challenge to mange . Whether you are Black , White , or Mexican , curly hair is simply different from straight . There are just certain things you cannot do with curly hair , some things that aren't healthy for it , and ways to make it grow that people wit straight hair don't have to worry about .
Growing up as a bi-racial child , I have endured the curls , the kinks and the poof my entire life . As I got older , my best friend became my hair straightener . I have never been very fond of my curls , and I always wanted long , bone-straight hair like my friends and step sisters . However , as I have gotten older , I have learned to embrace my hair , and take healthiness over personal thought .
I used to be extremely hard on my hair . Straightening it everyday on the highest setting , dying it  , perming it , washing it with sulfate enriched shampoo daily ... These are all HAIR DO NOT'S . I have changed my hair care ways for the better , so here are my tips and tricks for healthy , soft , growing , curly hair . (:
1 : DO NOT wash your hair every single day . I know there is sweat and oils in your hair ; however , the more you wash it , the more you are stripping your hair of it's natural moisture and making it more brittle and susceptible to damage .
2 : Don't flat iron your hair every day . Make it a two or three times a week thing if possible . It's really hard on your hair having it pressed between two plates at 350 degrees , and it breaks down it's strength .
3 : LOVE YOUR HAIR ! Yes , curly hair can be hard to manage , hard to brush , hard to style , it gets frizzy , etc . But it's the hair you were born with , so rock it !
4: If at all possible , avoid relaxers . Yes they are a temporary fix , but they are probably the most damaging thing you can do to your hair , right next to bleaching it . Relaxers , although they don't say it on the box , break down the structure of your hair . It goes into each strand it touches and tells the hair 'Dont Curl !' , but it's breaking and thinning your hair . The relaxed part of your hair will never be the same , and regardless of what you do , it wont be healthy until it grows back out .
5 : By good products ! The worst thing to do to your hair is to fall into the trap of 'If it's expensive , it must work really good' . FALSE ! Read the labels ! I cannot stress that enough . There are things to look out for . For example , you don't want shampoo with Sulfates of any kind in them . Also , avoid conditioners , gels , and foams with Alcohol in them . Although these products may claim to help your hair , the sulfates and alcohol are going to make your hair brittle and breakable . However , you should look for things like olive oil , vitamin A , and vitamin E .
6 : If you are going to use heat products , such as blow dryers , frequently , by a heat protecting spray . Spray it on your hair prior to applying heat , to avoid extensive heat damage .
7 : A common misconception about curly hair , especially in African-American culture , is that their hair doesn't grow . Poppy cock ! It grows just like everybody else's , but curly hair take slightly longer to show progress . The reason for this is that curly hair growing out of the skull has to curl out of the skull , so it takes longer to see progress , whereas straight hair just comes straight down , there for it's faster and easier to see the results .
8 : Trim your hair often . Once a month is recommended , but it is always good to chart the growth of your hair , and see when it is best to trim for you (:
Enjoy your hair , take care of it , love it ! (:
-Elle ♫

Friendship , When is it real ?

When is a friendship real ? A friendship is real when you know no matter what happens , that person has your back . A friendship is real when you can laugh together , cry in front of each other , make bad decisions together , and fix them as a team . A friendship is real when they become more like family then just a 'Friend' . Finally a friendship is real when you can tell each other everything about one another without fear of rejection or judging .
How can you tell ? Sometimes you wont know with out trial and error . As heart breaking as it may be , sometimes the only way you find out is by having a 'friend' bail out on you or judge you . It happens to every one at one point in time or another .
I have been thinking a lot lately about memories I have acquired over the years , then 7th grade came to mind . See , in English class one day , a friend of mine and I came up with these candy nick names for one another and made one for one of our other friends . By mid-lunch period , everyone at our school had a 'Candy Name' . We decided it would just be us three , though . As time progressed , we added two more girls to our group . We called ourselves 'The Kandi Krew' . These girls were the four closest girls to me at that point in time , and I was ecstatic about our group . We would tell one another things we couldnt tell another soul . The problems comes in here . As I look back on it now , I realize , the entire foundation of that group was ... almost fake . I mean , our commitment to the group was real , but our commitment to each other was misguided . We didn't tell all of the group everything like we had promised , and we didn't try getting closer to the girls we didn't know as well . Sure we had cool name , but looking back on it now , we were fooling ourselves all year . Guess hein sight is 20/20 huh ?
But today , a girl , who was never in that group , is now my closest and best female friend . She is a true friend , and she is basically my sister . She is 3 days older than me , shares my same personality traits , and most importantly is always there for me . Of coarse , I will never forget my Kand Krew friends , but this girl , that I met at the same time , is the one I truly look to when I'm in need , and she's always the one to fall back on . And that , is when you know you have a true friend . <3
-Elle ♫

Respect ... Expected or Earned ?

I'm sure over the years you have been told to respect your elders , but the question is ... Are they all respectable ? See , there are people that believe that you should respect your elders simply because they are older , and have been around longer , so it is assumed that they are wiser and know more . But is that always the case ? Because I know from experience , old age doesn't automatically make you a wiser person .
There are people that will argue both sides of this story . Where do I stand on this topic ? I believe respect is something a person must EARN not that it should be handed to them for any one reason . I have never been one to tolerate bullshit or disrespect , regardless of age or social status , so the idea that I should respect the 'Adults' in my life has never been a followed philosophy . I understand the reasoning behind it , though . Back in better times , the older you were , the wiser you got . You aquired information about life , learned little techniques and short cuts for things , and you were a looked up to and respected person in your community . However , times have changed . Not ever older person , or even 30 year old you meet is smarter or wiser than you . A lot of them are simply as immature today as when they were fresh into high school . So what about these people is respectable exactly ?
I am not the 'Turn The Other Cheek' kind of gal either . I don't give respect unless it's do , but I don't take disrespect , EVER . There are certain lines you do not cross with me . You don't talk badly about me or my family , you don't put your nose in my business , and you dont bring people into a debate of ours , that has nothing to do with them . Those are the main things that get me upset faster than any other thing . And I assure you I will go rounds with any person who tries to test that theory .
This recently got my mother and I into an argument . See , my mother was raised in the 80's with strict , military parents . So , respect your elders is kind of tattooed into her skull , not to mention she is way less confrontational than I am . I recently had a run in with a man on Facebook , a GROWN man , who decided to cause problems with me for no reason over a loving status directed towards my boyfriend . I wanted to correct him , cause not only was it none of his concern , he also had his facts wrong . I was told by my mother that it was disrespectful of me , that I had no right , and that if I started anything with people outside my age group , she was shutting down my social media networks ... ALL OF THEM ...
Well , that's just a risk I am willing to take . So where do you stand ? Do you believe that any one older than you deserves your respect because they have been around longer , or do you believe that respect is given where respect is due ?
-Elle ♫

Oh wherrrreee is my hairbrush ? ♫♪

HAIR ! Yes , hair . A four letter word , yes I know . But did you also know , its also my passion ? ♥ I have been doing hair since I was about 8 years old . I do everything from cutting , to dying , perming ( relaxing , not texture perms ) , styling , braiding , and I'm learning extension and weaving . I am intrigued by everything about doing hair . Long hair , short hair , all hair . I've even worked with a couple people to get their hair healthy again .

My long term goal is to eventually own my very own hair salon , get big and well known . More short term , I am just focused on getting graduated from high school . I had determined I wanted my own salon , at a young age , in 7th grade . I knew I wanted to do hair , but who wants to work UNDER someone else forever ? Honestly . I wanted the recognition to be on me , I wanted the reputation of being a good quality , trust-able salon . Some people don't want to put in the work or the extra school time to get the degrees to be the owner of their own business , or don't have the time , or can't afford the extra loan debt . I want to be the salon that they want a booth at , that they can feel comfortable working at , so they can start making the money to pay back the loans from their cosmetology degree , cause let me tell you , those degrees are not cheap !




I know a lady right now currently enrolled in Marinello school of beauty . This is a private school , which means no state funding . No Cal Grant , No Pell Grant , No SEOG ... Only loans . That's $32,000 ! Here's the kicker though ! This loan occurs interest over the span of time they have you pay it back in . They normally put you on a 10 year pay back plan , which means if you have a really good loan , it has a 3.5% interest rate , by the time you get to ten years you have payed back $112,000 .
So I completely understand not wanting to go to another school afterwards and occur more debt . However , I am passionate and driven . I will stop at nothing to make this happen for me , and once it does I will be able to hire others who just wanna do hair , not have to bother with business and accounting .
I have gained so much knowledge about hair over the years , and I have done so much with hair . I am happy to give someone a new look that highlights their features and makes them more confident . To me it's not about the pay check . I mean yeah , some salons make bank , but to me the real payment is seeing the look on a clients face when they fall in love with their hair . That's the look I want to see everyday of my life , and know that I made it happen , it's the most amazing feeling in the world <3
Hair can be expensive , it can be hair to manage , it can be a lot of things and propose many of problems . That's where people like myself come in . Yes I know I am only 15 , but you're never too young to be good at what you do . Sometimes with hair , it just needs direction , or color , or a new style . Sometimes thick hair just needs to be thinned , sometimes frizzy hair needs a special treatment , or split ends removed . Things people don't think of that a hair dresser would just envision . That's what I do (: I hope to one day see my blog readers at my salon , I may even give you a discount if you show me this post in the future (;
-Elle ♫
P.S. in this blog post is pictures of work I have done on friends and family , these are not pictures off of Google , and I will link you to my Facebook page for proof .

Determnation is KEY

How many times have you said you wanted to do something , or that you were going to do something , and then you never followed through ? How many times have people said they'd do something for you , and it never happened ? The reason why is more than likely lack of motivation . Which is not to say other things don't come up . I , of all people , know that things happen . People move , people die , you know ? Shit happens . But honestly , a lot of failure comes from lack of interest , lack of discipline , and lack of determination . If you seriously want something , you make sure it happens , right ? Right .

I know it can be difficult , and not always something you wanna do , but if you don't set a goal , you will never reach one , and what the hell kind of good does that do ?! When I first got into high school , I slacked off , I didn't do shit , I didn't wanna be bothered and I thought nothing of it . You know where that got me ? With 65 credits by the time more than half of sophmore year was over . I've been in high school 3 years now , and only have 100 credits . I was a terrible student , and I lacked discipline and determination .
Never believe you can't rise above a funk you've fallen into ! It is always possible (: You gotta have a strong support system , and you have to be able to admit that you have a problem . Once you know there's a problem and can address what it is , you have to be able to take responsibility and not blame others . I spent a lot of time blaming my lack of success in freshman and sophmore year on my parents , on my friends , on society , on the work load , I used every single reason in the book why it couldn't possibly be MY fault . However , when I look back on it and really reflect , I could have done more , I could have pushed myself . I do admit , I was in a bad place at that point . I was homeless , my mother and I had just recently lost our car , we had no internet , at one point I was asked to live with my dad and help raise his son . So was I in a tuff spot with a lot going on ? Absolutely ! But the more I blamed others the worse off I was .
Do you wanna know I fixed it ? I STOPPED blaming others . I took responsibility for my own actions , faced the consequences , and found a program more suited for ME , that was going to make ME successful and gt ME through high school . When I left my first high school , my GPA ( Grade Point Average ) DIDN'T have a number before the decimal , if I'm not mistaken it was a 0.8 . Today , my GPA is a 3.43 !! In 6 months I have brought my grades up , my test scores up , and my GPA up . But this isn't just about school ! You can do absolutely anything you set you mind to ! IF you make a goal , and DETERMINATE !! Don't let anything hold you back . No matter what anyone says to you , you ARE strong , you CAN do this , and you WILL be successful , and any one who tells you otherwise , is simply not worth your valuable time (:
-Elle ♫
P.S. Below is a link to a song called 'Determinate' from the Disney original movie , 'Lemonade Mouth' . Yes , it is a , for lack of better terminology , a 'KID' song , but it speaks to the message I am trying to portray , and it has a wholesome message <3 Enjoy (:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1OtatoYRMGc

The Story of a Girl Pt.4

To fill the time she wasn't spending at her father's house , the girl spent time with her mom , friends , and grandparents . Most of the time she spent her days with her grandfather . They were practically best friends . From the time she was born until now , they did everything together . They ate together , they played Lego's with one another , they even watched tv together . But soon that would all change .
Her grandfather had a graveyard shift as a janitor , and every night as he would get ready for work , she would get ready for bed . She would give him a hug and a kiss and say , "Goodnight grandpa , see you in the morning." But this night ... This one night , her words differed . You see , this night she sad "Good bye grandpa , I love you." The last words he ever heard .
That night on his way to work , her grandfather died in a brutal car wreck . He had already had a stroke due to his smoking , which triggered a brain aneurism , his brain shut down causing a lead foot affect . The car took an unmentionable speed towards a stop light pole on the off ramp of the freeway . He hit the pole , flew into the air , caught fire and the car landed upside down . Although this happened fairly close to a fire house that heard the crash , it was too late to save him ... He flat lined on the way to the ER , then the coroner knocked on the door . It was a very early Sunday morning . The little girl had always been alight sleeper , but for some reason , she heard the knock at the door . Her mother told her not to worry and to go back to sleep . They went to church hours later , and the girl thought everything was fine . However , when they got home there were visitors , people she had never met before .
Her mother took her into the back room and told her that her grandfather had passed , and the girl fell apart . She locked herself in the bathroom and cried for an hour . With every scream and teardrop , she could feel the wall closing in around her , and it becoming a hassle to breathe . Her 9 year old mind couldn't comprehend how anything could come between her and her grandpa , she was simply devastated .. I mean , who wouldn't be ?
-Elle ♫

The Story of a Girl Pt.3

Some time had passed and she had become quite fond of her new , soon to be , family . She was even giving her dad a chance to prove himself again , but she should have known , there's no second chance at a first impression . She went through a tough move with her mom where they ended up in her grandparents house , which made her mother .. different . It was definitely odd to live in her grandparent's house , because they did things way beyond different . The were more old school and strict , where as her mom was more laid back and took different approaches to situations , this caused quite a bit of tension in the household . Around that same time she began spending every weekend at her dad's house .
Before long , she could hear wedding bells , that was if her new born brother wasn't making a total ruckus . It was finally time for the wedding , but there was an uneasy feeling in the pit of everyone's stomachs . Something didn't feel right but , hey ! Who wouldn't be a little nervous on such a big day ? The girl by now was 9 and her younger sister to be was her fellow flower girl , but no one brought their flowers to the garden , so they just smiled and waved as the walked down the isle .
The little girl could see that the kids were unhappy , that something was not right in her dad's marriage , but who's gonna believe a little kid , right ? She kept her mouth shut for most of the time , but then she realized , it's hardly worth it to be here , and canceled weekend after weekend .
Then tragedy hit at her mom's house , and her thoughts were flustered . She just found out her father had died in a car accident on his way to work . The girl was crushed , this man was the father she never had . The best friend she hadn't yet met , and the person her spoiled her to no end , and now he was gone ? She needed an escape , so she went back to he dad's house . Funny how humans always seem to try and run away from one drama by running straight into another .
After the weekend there , she discovered why she no longer went there , and began canceling weekends again .
The little girls dad was a control freak . He always seemed to have good intentions , but he never went about achieving them properly . He would tell her that her siblings were upset with her cause she wouldn't visit , and that they wouldn't talk to her if she flaked again , but the girl was strong so she said no , and she stuck on that .
She kept away from the house for a while , until they moved , then she was curious to see the new house . Never once did that poor girl feel comfortable in that house , and she was always terrified to go to sleep . She was uneasy , and knew she belonged with her mother . She visited way less often in this house , than in the last one . Imagine that .
-Elle ♫